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Chuck’s Space Diary #3

by Chuck on July 8, 2010 at 12:00 am
Posted In: Blog

Hot damn!  I found my space diary.  Forgetting you have a diary seems like something that dudes do, so I’m not apologizing to you, space diary.  To be honest, the only diary I’ve ever been able to keep is my Poo Log, keeping track of variations in my crap’s size, texture, odor, and “hot-butthole-feeling.”  Guys found it hilarious.  Girls were all like, “Ew germs gross.”

I’ll write more soon.  If I feel like it.  And it may be more about poop than about my feelings.  Everyone knows feelings are for girls, and girls no longer exist.  Oh jam!  I think I just did a philosophy.  I gotsta tell Bax.

Peace, Love, and Dino Nuggets,

Chuck Freeballin Rockwood

P.S.  I found out I’m probably not president of space.

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Chuck’s Space Diary #2

by Chuck on March 2, 2010 at 12:00 am
Posted In: Blog

Dear Space Diary,

Well, we didn’t die.  We’ve got a dope greenhouse here (despite its lack of dope), so it looks like we can survive for a while.  Baxter is still pretty lame, but I’m confident I can turn him into a rad dude like myself.  Only time will tell, Space Diary, and we’ve got a lot of that.

XOXO,

Chuck Fisticuffs Rockwood, P.O.S. (President of Space)

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Baxter’s Survival Blog #1

by Baxter on February 23, 2010 at 3:19 pm
Posted In: Blog

Hello Hypothetical Reader,

Now that death seems a little less imminent, I’ve decided to record my thoughts for posterity (if there is any of that).  My companion, Charles Rockwood, hasn’t been very friendly, but I’m hoping that once I show him these cool jumpsuits I found, he’ll be a little more amiable.  I’d write more, but it appears Chuck is talking to the toilet again.  I should probably see what’s wrong with him.

Yours in the Void,

Baxter Rufus Paddock

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Chuck’s Space Diary #1

by Chuck on February 1, 2010 at 12:00 am
Posted In: Blog

Dear Space Diary,

Earth blew up today.  Everyone I’ve ever known except this nerdy mission specialist is dead, including that skank Lana who gave me crabs.  See how easy it is to find the silver lining, Space Diary?  Also, since I’m one of only two people still alive, I’m declaring myself President of Space.  I’ll post again soon unless I die.

Hail to the Chief,

Chuck, President of Space

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